Wednesday, October 22, 2014

I'm Packin' My Bags (King Curtis Voice)

No pretty pictures for this post, guys! Sorry about that, it's just a quick little jot about the goings on in my life lately so I can look back and remember exactly how I felt before going to Seoul (hint--- SCARED and SAD!)

I've said pretty much all my goodbyes. Sometimes I feel like I'm making this more dramatic on myself than I need to. But I take these kinds of things very seriously and always view a major life change as some sort of death and almost mourn it. I'm weird like that. But in a way, a part of my life is dying, I will never be this age with my family set up in this way, in this position in my life ever again. I've had a lot of fun and I will miss being this Julia. Because we all change as we get older, and I'll never have this mind set with these thoughts and goals again. So that's a little sad. And of course there are so many other things running through my mind, fears about the job, if I'll be a good teacher, how I'll make friends, getting used to the city, etc.

But at the moment, I am at peace. Actually, so far waking up has been the saddest part of the day for me. I've lived in this home almost my entire life. I know this bed and this room so well, they are a part of me. I'm used to the way the light filters in, the sound of the birds that live in our big tree, the feeling of my pillow. It is very comforting. Waking the first day up after traveling, especially after a long travel overseas, is very disconcerting. There have been many times I've woken up and forgotten where I am and I panic for several seconds. Sometimes I wake up and I think I'm home and I'll remember I'm somewhere else.

So yes, tomorrow is my last day here in Dallas. I've had so much fun the past few weeks, hanging out with friends and family. My Goodbye Texas Food Tour 2014 has left me with food hangovers on more than one occasion and I fear the scale at this point. So a large part of me is excited to leave (but saying that feels like a betrayal) simply because I'll feed myself better. Today I had lunch at Joe's with my dad, Fogo de Chao for dinner... yesterday we had Babe's Chicken for dinner... I have had chipotle like every day for two months hoping to ween myself off of it (I FAILED). So yeah, I'm feeling pretty sick as of late.

I leave Thursday morning everyone! And I arrive with literally like 5 suitcases Friday night. As soon as I can get internet, I'll update you again. I would appreciate everyone's thoughts, prayers, well wishes. See you in Seoul!

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